Dr. Eli’s Workshops Fall 2023
Please join me this fall for my workshop series hosted by the Pincus Center
Mono/CNM Mixed Relationship Support Group
Ongoing, every other Monday at 7 pm Eastern US time September 18 – December 11
This group is for anyone with relationship issues related to a mismatch in the desire for CNM and their partners. We offer judgement-free support for wherever people fall in the wide spectrum of singular/plural relating. This group is inclusive of all stages of gender exploration, sexual orientations, and neurotypes, and meets virtually every other week.
Raising the Village: Building NonMonogamous Families as Parents
November 14, 2023 7 pm Eastern US time
Can kids handle knowing their parents are nonmonogamous? How “out” can you be in your life if you have kids, and what are the risks? What does co-parenting look like in a consensually nonmonogamous (CNM) framework? Nonmonogamy has plenty of challenges when it’s adults without children; navigating it while building a family can feel totally overwhelming!
Using data from her 25+ year study of polyamorous families with children, nonmonogamy coach and expert Dr. Eli Sheff shows how growing up with parents who are involved in CNM relationships can impact children. This workshop explores if, when, and how to come out to kids about CNM, how to manage interactions with families of origin, and what to say at school or in kids’ peer groups.
The Rules of Threes: Traids, Threesomes, and Unicorn Hunting
December 12, 2023 7 pm Eastern US time
Triadic sexual encounters and romantic relationships are so common in fantasy and in real relationships throughout history that they’ve taken on an almost mythical appeal. With the dramatic rise of consensual nonmonogamy (CNM) in contemporary society, there are more couples than ever who are seeking to date others as a unit. Some of the couples date with aplomb, having a ton of fun and adventures with each other and the people they date. Other couples end up in drama and disaster, giving all three-way connections a bad rap. Still others get yelled at online, shamed for their desires, and can’t find a date to join them in their fun. It might all have you wondering whether three-ways are even possible outside of fantasy!
In this workshop, nonmonogamy coach and expert Dr. Eli Sheff explains what unicorn hunting means and how it differs from being in a triad/throuple or having an ethical threesome. She explores the dynamic of unicorn hunting from both the hunters’ perspective and the unicorn’s, identifying common pitfalls and how to avoid them.
Previous classes with videos available
To get access to these classes, please email Rebecca Rose-Vassey at rvassy@tamarapincus.com
Playing Mono/Poly: The Monogamy/CNM Dynamic
Recorded September 12, 2023
This class introduces the origins of the CNM/mono dynamic, explains when it works and when it does not, and explores some of the compromises people are able to craft to navigate these mixed relationships. Using information from 25+ years of research, 10+ years of coaching, and examples from Dr. Eli’s two marriages where she was the monogamous partner in love with someone who wanted CNM, this workshop is based on social science with a healthy dose of lived experience and real-world feelings.
What’s Your Flavor? Find Your Type of Nonmonogamy
Recorded October 10, 2023
Why is consensual nonmonogamy (CNM) a dream for some people and a disaster for others? This workshop outlines the six most popular forms of CNM in the United States today and explores when they work and when they don’t. From polygamy to relationship anarchy, there are many options for how to structure relationships– and choosing the right one for you makes all the difference.
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